Let me introduce you to Sofia.
Sofia was the best analyst on her team. First in, last out, reports so clean you could frame them. When the team lead role opened up, everyone assumed it was hers — including Sofia.
It went to Mark.
Mark was fine. Good, even. But in the promotion meeting, when Sofia’s name came up, a senior director nodded and said, “Sofia? Oh, she’s great. Very reliable.” Then the conversation moved on.
After more than 20 years in HR, I can tell you that “very reliable” is one of the most dangerous compliments in corporate life. It means we value you exactly where you are.
Sofia isn’t one person. I’ve met her many times, in different offices and countries. If you recognize her, you’re in good company. Here’s what she didn’t know, and what nobody writes down.
Great work gets you on the shortlist, not chosen for the job
Most of us grew up with a simple deal. Work hard, deliver, and someone will notice. That deal is how plenty of very capable people end up training the colleague who got the job they wanted.
In the room, nobody asks, “Who did the best work?” Everyone on the shortlist did good work. That’s why they are on a shortlist. The real question is, “Who do we trust with more?” And it’s hard to trust someone you’ve barely heard of.
Visibility is not bragging
So what did Mark do differently? He didn’t work harder. When the regional team needed someone to present the quarterly results, he raised his hand. The numbers were largely Sofia’s. The face people remembered was Mark’s.
Harvey Coleman’s much-quoted PIE model suggests performance accounts for only around 10% of what gets people ahead, with image and exposure doing most of the heavy lifting. I’d argue with the exact numbers, but not with the point. Mark understood it. Sofia didn’t.
The lesson isn’t to be more like Mark; please don’t present your colleagues’ work. Make your own work understandable to people who don’t see it every day. Share progress before anyone asks, and describe results by what changed for the business, not by how many hours they took. Say yes to the messy cross-functional project everyone else is avoiding, because that’s where senior people watch you think.
Out of sight, out of the promotion round
Here is an unpopular view: visibility is much harder to build through a screen.
The moments that shape how leaders see you happen in the corridor after a tense meeting, in the five minutes before everyone else logs on, when a senior person sees how you handle a problem in real time. I’m not arguing for anyone to be chained to a desk. But if you’re fully remote and hoping to move up, you’re playing the same game with fewer cards. Choose your office days deliberately and make them count.
You need a sponsor, not just a mentor
Sofia had a mentor, a lovely one who gave great advice over coffee. What she didn’t have was a sponsor. A mentor talks with you while a sponsor talks about you, in rooms you’re not in, and puts their credibility on the line for you.
You can’t ask for a sponsor. You earn one by doing work that makes them look good, and by making sure they know about it.
Speak your boss’s boss’s language
Now the part that stings. That year, Sofia rebuilt a reconciliation process that sharply reduced the finance team’s audit exposure. The CFO’s biggest headache was the audit. Sofia described her project as “streamlining some workflows.”
Same work, completely different story. Your manager cares about your work, and your manager’s boss cares about their own problems: costs, a restructuring, a difficult board, a project going sideways.
Connect your work to those problems, or you’re applying for a promotion in a language the decision-makers don’t speak.
What you can do this week
If you’ve been passed over for a promotion before, or are hoping to earn one in the future, there are steps you can take now to improve your chances of being chosen next.
- Translate your year: Take three things you delivered and rewrite each in terms your boss’s boss would care about: money, risk, time, or reputation.
- Ask one good question: Ask your manager, “What is your boss most worried about this year?” Then find the overlap with your own work.
- Find your person: Identify one senior leader who has seen your work up close. Keep them in the loop.
- Don’t wait for review season: By then, most of the thinking is already done.
A word to my own profession
None of this is fair. HR could fix that by writing these rules down in plain language, instead of leaving people to discover them after they’ve been passed over twice. Until we do, consider this column the unofficial memo.
