The Surprising Truth About Office Gossip And Belonging

Research states that a high sense of belonging can lead to a 56% increase in job performance, a 50% reduction in turnover risk, a 167% increase in employer net promoter score, and a 75% decrease in sick days.
Gossip is defined as just sharing information, but it can also be a toxic form of empathy. When clarity and information are withheld or lack of transparency is common within an organization, people may spend their time sharing inaccurate or embellished information that can be harmful.
Acting quickly and bringing awareness to root causes early is key to ensure your team or organization doesn’t enter the danger zone of psychological safety deterioration.

In her book, The Fearless Organization, psychological safety researcher Amy Edmondson writes that low levels of psychological safety can result in a culture of silence. The causes and implications of a culture of silence is described in a Forbes article as “business instabilities” such as lack of clarity, bias, in groups/out groups, and lack of fairness — resulting in gossiping among a smaller group of friends.

In other words, gossip may serve as a big ol’ red flag that you’re inching towards a culture of silence.

The Tipping Point of Psychological Safety

This article is about unpacking the stage in between feelings of safety at work by expressing healthy candor, openness and trust and the start of decaying levels of psychological safety.

I believe this stage is crucial to understanding how we can identify behavioral patterns early that provide hints that a team or organization may be moving towards a culture that lacks psychological safety and a sense of belonging.

Understanding “Sense of Belonging”

Belonging is both an individual and shared experience that, when channeled in a positive and healthy way, can create massive change and momentum. For organizations, a sense of belonging can be channeled into a powerful and fulfilling experience for individuals and organizations. In fact, research states that a high sense of belonging can lead to a 56% increase in job performance, a 50% reduction in turnover risk, a 167% increase in employer net promoter score, and a 75% decrease in sick days.

Given these stats, most organizations understand the business and human case to cultivate belonging, and are often looking for tactics and programmatic ways to increase it (i.e. the happy hours, the lunch and learns, the DEI trainings, etc.). However, gaps start to present themselves when it comes to understanding how current systems, behaviors, and norms can participate in decreasing safety and promoting exclusion. Good intent doesn’t always translate into actual impact.

Striving for Belonging: How Belonging & Gossiping Intersect

When we hear about gossip within the workplace, many people want to narrow right in on the person or people (“they are causing drama”) when we should be focused on the source (“could I or the organization be the drama?”). You may be thinking, “Wait, this feels counterintuitive. Why would someone who strives to belong engage in behavior that further isolates and creates drama, like gossiping?” The answer is in the word “strives.”

Belonging that feels like it must be earned because your organization’s culture or society has signaled repeatedly that some people will continue to live on the margins of true belonging is not belonging at all — it’s a culture that lacks inclusion, equity, and safety.

Look Deeper: 4 Signs Your Organization May be Incentivizing Destructive Gossip Through Lack of Belonging

In Groups/Out Groups: Gossip brings people together. Yes, the tea 🫖 is something we all have wanted to spill or engage in at some point. Other than drama, gossip mirrors the feeling of being in an “in group.” If you are an outsider or treated like one within the environment/culture you operate, the feeling of being “inside the circle” can feel overwhelming positive — at least in the moment. If I don’t feel heard, loathe my job and my leader, for example, gossip might feel like the only tolerable outlet.
Gossip Disguised as Empathy: Gossip is a toxic form of empathy. We love to relate to each other: even when it can potentially be harmful. However, gossip can turn into a source of waste and emotional labor quickly — causing your most trusted people who possess the most social capital to be burnt out and depleted of emotional resources.
Structural Silos: Silos are usually created by systems and structure first, not people. If people are incentivized to operate individually or based on likeness or marginalization, that’s exactly what will happen.
Labeling all gossip as “bad.” Gossip is defined as just sharing information, and the average person spends almost an hour a day “gossiping.” However, when clarity and information are withheld or lack of transparency is common or cultural within an organization, people may spend their time sharing inaccurate or embellished information that can be harmful.

Taking Swift Action

I am by no stretch of the imagination saying gossip and siloing is okay. I’m suggesting that we look deeper — deeper into culture and systems that may be reinforcing or causing conditions that make these behaviors feel like the only or best option.

If you find yourself experiencing gossip, acting quickly and bringing awareness to root causes early is key to ensure your team or organization doesn’t enter the danger zone of psychological safety deterioration.

First, address the behavior. Begin with objective facts, seek to learn more, and address the impact of the gossip.

Then, understand the context and address structural challenges:

In Groups/Out Groups: Consider if the person or persons involved in the gossip could feel as if they are on the fringes or a part of an out group. Think within the organization (department, clique, position, how and with whom information is shared, etc.), but also think broader — from a social identity perspective. Could nationality, race, language, age, religion, socioeconomic status, sexual orientation, political affiliation, etc., be playing a role?
Gossip Disguised as Empathy: Consider if your organization encourages destructive empathy. –
- Do leaders role model gossip? Is venting publicly displayed without tools to address healthy conflict and problem solving?
- Is conflict handled in a healthy way?
Structural Silos: How have silos been created within the organization – especially in a hybrid work environment. What pockets of the organizational structure feel like an “us versus them”? Where might there be instances where people are dehumanized and bucketed into group identities, geographies, or labels that come with assumptions. For example, field employees and admin employees or floor employees and back-office employees or leadership versus everyone else.
Lack of clarity and transparency: Does your team/organization keep information close and often shared only to those who “need to know.” Could the people who “need to know” be a part of an in-group?

By taking this contextual approach, you can not only address the behavior, but also address gossip as a symptom of lack of psychological safety and belonging to avoid a culture of silence.